Big Brother 9 Live Feeds, February 17th – Part III, “Be the Ears, Not the Mouth”

After the PoV ceremony, Amanda had asked if they could survive the next three days without any drama, and the fact is they only would if she wasn’t there, as she seems to be in the center of it. Several comments she made about others came back to haunt her last night as first Chelsia went off on her, followed by Alex and Josh. Here’s the aftermath.

Allison tries to console Amanda, but she seems to not want anything to do with anyone right now. Allison is also upset about how violently Josh reacted. Natalie is still upset about Amanda calling her a slut. Parker is now upset about Alex bringing him and Jen, as well as Ryan and Allison, into the fight. Alex was only explaining how this all came about, but Parker now thinks Alex made him more of a target by bringing them into it. Of course, it’s just something else now for Parker to whine about.

Allison goes to Matt trying to draw her own sympathy out of this, telling him how much the fight upset her. She tells Natalie and Sheila how it upsets her that Jen is talking about what will happen when she wins HoH next week, as that’s implying that her and Ryan are already gone.

Alex apologizes to Chelsia for the comments his partner made, and she tells Josh not to say anything else when Amanda comes back out. He doesn’t think there’s anything left in him. Everyone starts to wonder if Amanda will DOR, but in reality they don’t think they’ll be that lucky. Alex is still upset about Amanda putting him in this position, and Parker is still upset about Alex putting him and his partner in this position.

With Amanda still in the DR, Alex calls an impromptu meeting in the kitchen. He talks about Natalie coming up to the HoH the night before, and she admits that Amanda put her up to it, then came in and got mad at Natalie for being up there with Alex, so it seems Amanda set everyone up like this, her supposed friend and her partner. Alex wants it known nothing happened, and says he got a massage from Sharon, and Amanda got upset about that too. He feels like she flips out when he talks to other girls, yet does things with Parker, then says that Alex tried to rape her, which didn’t happen. Everyone is backing Alex up completely.

Parker admits he likes Amanda, but says right now he’s “chillin’” because she seems to be trouble. He didn’t get into the argument, as everyone seemed to know more than he did. If it’s the truth, he wants it to come out. He then launches into the Oompah Loompa song, oddly enough. Chelsia hopes that the reason Amanda came on the show was to grow as a person, as she’s pretty on the outside, but needs some improvement on the inside. Sheila points out Amanda is really young and just wants everyone to love her, and sometimes that makes you do stupid things.

Amanda finally gets out of the DR, says good night to everyone, and Josh screams at her again. She has a picture of her dad that they gave her in the DR, and in tears, says anyone that wants to come look at the picture can. Huh? Why would they want to do that? Apparently Sharon and Jen, who go up there, as Amanda uses the opportunity to say all that was a bunch of lies and she never said anything about anyone. Jen tells her, as a friend, that she thinks Alex is afraid to be around her now. Amanda just wants to point out she wasn’t the one that was naked. Jen then asks her what a noose is. Sigh. Amanda gives herself kudos for playing with such integrity. That whole situation is kind of like an oxymoron.

The DR gives Alex permission to sleep on the couch so that he doesn’t have to be with Amanda who has accused him of rape after teasing him. He goes in to get his stuff, and she runs into the bathroom. Matt is with him and tells Amanda that just so she knows, he didn’t say shit. Amanda just doesn’t get it, as she spreads even more shit, apparently to make others think she’s not the worst person there. She tells everyone up there that Josh told her he has gonorrhea and shot in eight guys’ mouths after he found out, plus had been with 200 different people. What does that have to do with the price of rice in china? She claims BB won’t allow her to go home. Oh you can go home, Honey, you just have to sign a nice little paper first.

Amanda faces us through the camera and asks if she gets naked if we’re going to watch. I’d actually rather not, thanks. Somehow through her pain, Amanda manages to tell Parker that she only likes black guys, so she doesn’t know why they matched her with a white guy. She apologizes to him and says it’s all her fault since she flirted with him. Oh brother. Get a clue. Parker hears from her that Chelsia tried to apologize, but Amanda refused to listen. In reality, Chelsia only apologized for the comment about the noose. There was no way in hell she was going to apologize for anything else. She wants to know if she really does look like a horse. I know I shouldn’t find that amusing, but I do.

Jen talks to Matt about the votes, and he tells her she should try and cut a deal with Chelsia and James. She says she’s been thinking about it, but wanted to wait until tomorrow. Parker goes to leave, but Amanda works on his sympathy, saying she’s going to go ask the DR for her bag. When he asks if she’s sure she wants to do that, she asks if he and Jen will come back.

A bunch of people are in the bathroom talking about this crazy night, and as Parker enters, Adam asks “What’s up Slut?” Parker then feels he should defend Amanda, telling Natalie she never called her a whore.

Jen and Allison are in the SR trying to get over their latest thing which is Jen making fun of Allison’s unmatching bathing suit, and these comments are suddenly the worst thing in the world that could happen to Allison. Yet, she says the comments didn’t hurt her feelings at all. Huh? Amanda goes back into the DR. As Sheila is talking to Allison, Ryan walks in, and Allison blows up at him for not telling her that Jen was saying mean things about her bathing suit. Was she feeling left out of the drama or something? What does this have to do with anything?

Natalie and Matt talk about finding a new alliance. Suddenly the thing with Amanda/Alex and Jen/Parker isn’t seeming to be such a good thing. He knows Jen and Parker are probably going home, and he doesn’t really care too much.

Alex and Amanda get together to hash out how they’re going to get through this now as partners. They craft some new rules. The first is that she has to drop the daddy card. The next is that she has be be the ears and not mouth. She says the only reason she talks is because he won’t listen to her, so he agrees to listen to her whenever she has something to say. Uh-oh. She has to try and work things out with Josh, and if she likes Parker, that’s fine, but she can’t hide it, giving other people things to talk about behind her back.

Water has been spilled on Ryan and Allison’s bed. It was Matt and Adam playing a trick on them, but they think it was Jen being petty. She’s upset to think Ryan would think such a thing about her. Ryan then talks to Adam, telling him he thinks it was Parker that spilled the water. Jen comes to talk to Ryan, being mad at him for telling Allison she was making fun of her suit, but Ryan says it was the opposite; she was made him for not telling her. They also talk about this “thing” that’s going to come out, and it has something to do with Ryan not being happy that Jen is paired with a black guy.

They finally start talk about the race thing with Ryan saying he does not agree with interracial relationships, but he does have black friends and isn’t a racist. Does he not see that saying that makes it seem even more so? Amanda is trying really hard to keep to her promises and not spread the gossip she knows is going around about the water on the bed and Ryan’s racist feelings. She runs off to tell people excitedly that people are fighting and it has nothing to do with her. She then finally heads to bed, telling Alex she’s been ears, just like she was supposed to be.

Parker tells Jen and Ryan that he is boycotting the DR right now, and he also plans to boycott media. It says in their contract that they have to attend the media events, but it doesn’t say they have to speak. He imitates Chenbot asking him how it was on the show as he just sits there. The race issue also comes up, and he tells Ryan he really doesn’t care how he feels about interracial relationships.

James and Adam sit in the backyard smoking, talking about everything that has gone on today. They both think there are more twists or couples, and looking at the four-sided cube in the guinea pig cage, they think maybe that means there are four couples that knew each other outside the house. Oy!

Eventually everyone is in bed by 5:00 AM. Have to say I miss my All Night Dick.

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Video of the Big Fight

I’m not sure what my favourite part is. Could be Joshuah’s “giddy-up” in the hot tub. Or maybe the completely random shot of the empty BB house in the middle of the action. Perhaps it’s Chelsia’s impression of Amanda running around with her butt hanging out. Want to see the fight for yourself? Here it is! (And we have to warn you, the language is pretty nasty and definitely NSFW.)

httpv://www.youtube.com/watch?v=sGyRdcq9TN8

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Big Brother 9 Live Feeds, February 17th – Part II, Looking For Drama and Finding It

After the Golden Veto was not used, Josh tells Ryan he and Allison are safe now, and many people want Jen and Parker out. He tells him even Natalie is coming around to their side. They talk about Amanda and Alex being on everyone’s radar, as they’re all getting a little sick of Amanda. Jen comes and joins the group and the conversation suddenly changes and couldn’t be more obvious as they begin talking about the water in the hot tub and the grass.

Amanda finds Parker in the boat room, and tells him she likes her belly rubbed, but he could care less as he only wants to whine bout how tough he has it, being that he had to keep Jen and Ryan’s secret. For what, all of a couple of days? Parker, the guy that has rated all the women in the house a 6, except for Chelsia who rated a 7, tells Amanda it sucks to be reminded of your faults all the time. And to be rated a 6 feels great? They get in a quick kiss, and he tells her he understands that she isn’t ready for more just yet.

The Irony of the Day Award goes to Amanda, as Natalie is telling everyone in the hot tub that Amanda only pretended to be her friend in the house, but all along she’s been backstabbing her, Amanda walks out to the hot tub, sits down, and asks if everyone thinks they’ll actually go the next three days in the house without any drama.

Allison tells Amanda that Ryan thinks the biggest threat in the house is Parker, and the next biggest is Amanda and Alex. She wants Amanda to know she doesn’t blame her for putting her and Ryan on the block, as she wouldn’t have done the same thing. Amanda just stares at herself and decides she is getting chubby.

A bunch of the ladies sit around the hot tub chatting, saying it was stupid for Jen and Ryan to spill the secret of their relationship so early. Thank you! Sheila slams Parker, saying if he wants to stay in the house, why is he going around rating all the girls? Again, thank you! He had said there was only one good-looking woman in the house, and that was Amanda. Sheila was told she was probably an 8 when she posed for Penthouse. She apparently is letting it all out with the girls, saying there isn’t one guy in the house she would actually “do.” She thought Alex was attractive … until he liked Amanda. Even when she was a Penthouse Pet, Sheila claims she wouldn’t have ever dressed the way Amanda does with the shorts up her ass.

Josh tells Sharon that since Amanda and Alex can’t play for HoH this time, it’s a prime opportunity to get them out of the house. She asks what would happen if they used the veto, and he-hadn’t thought of that. Umm, has anyone other than Sharon heard of backdooring? Just asking.

Sheila covers a little, telling Amanda she and Allison usually talk about their lives, as they’ve both been through a lot. Amanda, of course, has been through a lot too! Amanda spreads a little gossip about Matt and Natalie getting naked the night before, then complains yet again that Alex doesn’t like her wearing her short shorts. She tells Sheila she still looks great at her age, but Sheila knows she could use a little Botox on her forehead and “waddle.”

Not surprisingly, Matt, the guy that gets oral sex from Natalie, then grins at the camera, and tells Alex he loves all the drama. They’re both waiting for Josh to snap, and they loved the heated exchange with cup-throwing between Sheila and Adam the other day. They figure that was a great show to watch. Yeah, a real riot.

Natalie does color on Chelsea’s and James’ hair, and James talks about the tattoo on his neck, saying some prison guy in his uncle’s cabin did it, but it turned all puss-y, and he sat there picking at the scabs. Is there honestly nothing else to talk about? The problem is the tattoo has the C word in it, so BB asks him to cover it up, and he uses a bandaid.

Jen and Allison appear to patch things up, with Jen saying she hopes people will realize the only reason she is on the block is because she refused to vote out Ryan the first week of the show. She asks Allison if she plans to take advantage of “all” the endorsements that come their way after the show. She thinks it would be cute if she and Ryan could do some together. Honestly, what do they think happens after this show? Remember that Zach thought women would be beating down his door, and that was after they saw his little willie.

The pigs sit around talking, as they talk about which girls are into who. Matt offers to pass off Natalie if anyone wants her, and talks about thinking Allison is into him, saying from the waist down she isn’t bad. He doesn’t want to have full blown out sex with anyone here, as it could ruin things at home between him and his ex. It just makes me shake my head. They all agree Jen has a smoking body they’d all be into if her boyfriend wasn’t in the house, and I only agree with them when they al about Parker being stupid to call all the girls 6s.

Sharon has the line of the day in the bathroom later, telling Jen and Parker that the show is like a high school sleepover you can’t get a ride home from.

Matt talks to Parker, and whistles at Allison as she walks by, then says having her would be too easy, but Sheila would be a challenge. Parker asks if he’d “do” Sheila, as he says not that, as he has respect. He does? He won’t have sex or kiss anyone,but if someone wants to give him pleasure, he’ll take it. His mom’s friends watch he show, and he doesn’t want them seeing him getting it on with everyone. But having oral sex under the sheets isn’t bad, right?

Alex is getting increasingly angry about his situation with Amanda, and he looks directly into the camera at one point and tells BB to make no mistake about it. If he loses this game, it’s on account of “that bitch.” Well, that’s to the point, isn’t it?

Alex then goes to James for a little chat. James is honest telling Alex he’s amazing, but he can’t stand Amanda. Alex knows exactly what he means, as James tells him if he leaves, it’s on account of his partner. James suggests that Jen and Parker have to leave, because the triangle created with Parker, Amanda, and Alex is something that just doesn’t need to happen. After the conversation, James goes to jump rope.

Pretty much nothing else happens for awhile as Parker talks of alternate names for the vagina. Wow, that’s some real entertainment. Natalie breaks up everything extremely angry at Amanda, as she hears that she has been telling people that James said if he gets HoH, he intends to put up Amanda/Alex and Matt/Natalie. Natalie thinks Amanda is just trying to break up her and Matt, and she thinks this makes her into a target. For some reason, this is shocking to her.

Chelsia heard the whole thing, and she’s upset that Amanda is talking shit about James and possibly her. She confronts Amanda in the hot tub who flatly denies everything. She then brings Natalie outside, bringing the two sources together to confirm. Amanda flat out denies the whole thing, saying she never talked about Chelsia behind her back, and that her name never came up, swearing on her dead father. Natalie points out her and James play as one, so if Amanda is saying James is nominating someone, that implies that Chelsia is backing him up on it agrees.

Alex has to give out a huge Amen to that one from Chelsia, because he’s been saying that all night. Amanda is still whining big time that no one is listening to her or letting her talk, and she just doesn’t get it. Josh jumps into the mix and calls her a horse-face, and C-word, and screams at her at the top of his lungs for quite some time, telling her everyone in the house hates her and wants her gone. Alex just wants Amanda to see that people are partners in this game, James/Chelsia and the two of them as well. Josh eventually stalks off, and Alex and Chelsia continue to scream at Amanda.

At a certain point Chelsia does a hilarious impression of Amanda, as she pulls her pants down below her ass and struts around. Alex again tries to put everything simply, that the people that are up on the block, Amanda and he put up for the house, as the two people with an outside relationship have an unfair advantage, so they wanted to break them up. But everything that has been done since then is what everyone is upset about.

Chelsia and Amanda continue to go at it, and eventually it gets to Chelsia using the word noose, which Amanda thinks is her making fun of her dad killing himself. Chelsia says she has an aunt that killed herself, but you don’t see her running around flipping her tits every time someone says something. Amanda stalks off telling Chelsia that wasn’t very nice, trying to make her feel guilty and make everyone feel sorry about her, but it doesn’t seem to work very well, except for on Allison, willing to find friends wherever she can.

Eventually the fighting is over, but there is still a lot of aftermath to go through. Find all that out in the next post!

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Big Brother 9 Live Feeds, February 17th – 1st Half of Day, All Parker; All the Time

First of all, I need to answer the question Carrie ended her last post with. Yes, the Big Brother house is filled mostly with pigs this season. It’s like a house full of Boogies. And then the other half are willing to cheapen themselves on camera, as they think they’re going to find real love with these pigs. It’s like a house full of Ericas.

The HGs are woken up a little after 10 AM this morning and told that the PoV ceremony will be happening around noon. On BB, that means generally some time before dinner.

Matt and Parker have a pow wow, concerned over James’ and Chelsia’s vote. Matt knows that James is on the fence, although his partner Chelsia definitely wants Ryan and Allison out. Matt can’t believe that Ryan doesn’t even know how to campaign, but Parker points out it’s not exactly his strong-suit either. He’s especially weary of doing it since he we slamming Allison for doing it, as it wouldn’t seem right now. Ya think?

Parker then goes to get the information straight from the horse’s mouth. He find James and Chelsia and asks where they stand. James admits he wants Parker out for personal reasons, and Chelsia admits it’s a split vote for them. Jen joins in, and Parker says she doesn’t like to campaign, as it makes him feel like he’s talking shit about people. And … just what does he think he’s doing now? James and Chelsia want some guarantee that if they vote against Jen and Parker and they stay, that it won’t be held against them. Are they kidding? From Parker?Mr. Whiney? Chelsia admits she wants Ryan and Allison’s bed. Well, there’s a great reason for voting them out, if ever I saw one.

Okay, understandably, Parker doesn’t like to campaign, yet does it anyway, yet then seems to keep shooting himself in the foot. While the girls are spending endless time getting ready for the PoV creamy dressing, doing hair and makeup, etc. Parker tells them he hopes he didn’t offend them last night when he was rating them and gave them all 6s. He’s just a particular guy when it comes to girls. And just why would a girl on the fence vote for him to stay after that? Women of the world, I implore you, after he’s evicted, and you see him walking down the street hiding behind his camera, tell him his personality is a 1. Then tell him you hope he’s not offended.

James and Chelsia are having a very sweet conversation, talking about their future, most likely, individual marriages, with her saying she wants something simple on the beach. Chelsia doesn’t want to wear a wedding dress, but wants the groom to be in white. He says he wants simple as well, with a sunflower in the bride’s hair. He thinks perhaps getting married in Iceland. Maybe these two are a love match. Yet, their sweet conversation is interrupted by Parker coming in saying that Allison is upset that she was rated a 6, and he reminds Chelsia she’s a 7. Like she’s supposed to be grateful for this or something.

Amanda admits to Parker than she was only pretending to sleep last night and heard everything he and the other guys were talking about. This conversation goes nowhere, though, as Parker can only talk about James and Chelsia’ vote. He wants them out, as James is disgusting, and I think he’s referring to what James admitted the other day about being able to give himself oral sex. I ask you, wouldn’t every guy do that if they could? Amanda is upset with BB for not telling her to go to bed last night, because she’s tired. Is this adult woman serious? She also still thinks the eviction will be today. Where did they find this group of people?

While Parker is spending all this time worrying about James’ vote, it seems he should be worried about Adam as well. He claims he’ll have the last laugh, and Parker is a sucker if he thinks he’s not going home. James doesn’t seem quite as concerned about his vote, as he sits there becoming a contortionist, saying he’s double jointed, which BTW, an orthopedic surgeon has told me isn’t really possible, as he explained what really happens when we think someone is double-jointed, which I don’t remember of course. That old age thing getting to me.

Apparently the focus of the feeds today is to be All Parker, All the Time. He goes to Sharon to secure her vote. He wants to know if she gets HoH, will she nominate him, and sheclaims she wouldn’t, as she doesn’t hold grudges. He also tell her that her points go up when she dresses up. Please HGs have mercy on the rest of us and get rid of this guy. If I were a woman in that house, and thank God I am not, I would be getting rid of him on his comments about how he rates everyone alone. Sharon admits, too, that she only tried out for the show as a joke, and didn’t expect to make it. Parker saw the ad on Craigslist.

Amanda joins the disucssion and complains again about Alex. Give it a rest! It’s one thing to be a tease, but then to go around and spread rumors about what the guy is doing to you … and the whole time she’s rubbing up against Parker. If he’d start something with her, she’d probably run away from that too. A little later she’s upset that everyone knows she wants to be with Parker saying you can’t tell Allison anything. But you’ve been telling everyone, Amanda!

Allison just continues to cause trouble, mostly between Ryan and Jen. She tells him that Jen was in the bathroom with some others as everyone was discussing why the pairs were matched up the way they were. Jen had said the only reason Ryan doesn’t want her with Parker is because he’s black, and one of their family’s is racist, using the N word all the time. Allison doesn’t understand why Jen is Ryan’s girlfriend, but wants to cause trouble all the time.

Despite getting flames and guinea pigs a few different times, it’s always a false alarm, with no PoV ceremony yet, despite the fact that it’s over an hour past when it was supposed to start.

Natalie tells Josh she thinks she’ll be the entertainment of the show, then spends a lot of time complaining about Amanda, saying everything Natalie says she does or has done, Amanda always has to one up her. She also claims Amanda said that Bueno means hello in Spanish, even though everyone knows it’s really hola. She also wonders why Amanda keeps talking Spanish when she’s Italian. Because she’s loco.

In a conversation in the kitchen, the girls start talking food. Sheila thinks the only way she’ll lose weight here is if she’s on slop, and says “bless his heart” about Marcellas giving Chicken George his slop pass after he’d been on it for so long. Natalie tells a childhood memory of eating her mother’s laxatives, thinking they were just chocolates, and Sheila mentions that she once ate dog food by accident when she was little. Scintillating conversations while we wait for the PoV ceremony to begin.

After a short lockdown, we finally have the PoV ceremony. As expected, the golden veto was not used, and Jen confirms to Ryan that either way, one of them will be leaving. Jen sits on her bed pouting, with Ryan bringing her lunch in bed, and Parker is obviously very stressed out.

Honestly, what did Jen think was going to happen spilling her secret so early in the game? That was a huge mistake. It made her and Ryan both targets before anyone had any clearly defined enemies or alliances. As for Parker, I think that guy would be whining no matter what was happening.

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Big Brother 9, Episode 3 - The Secret is Out

It’s Sunday night. Time for the nomination ceremony, and to see what actually happened with Neil. If they decide to show us, that is. Let’s settle in for the episode, shall we?

Rehash of previous episodes. Sharon and Jacob fighting, while Ryan and Jen are paired up with other people. Sheila and Adam bickering, Parker and Jen winning the Power Couple thing, Jacob turning up the chicken, Parker calling Jacob out, Sharon ratting Ryan out, Jen revealing her and Ryan’s secret, Ryan doing the same thing with Allison, Sharon and Jacob getting the boot, Amanda and Alex winning HoH. We’re all caught up now.

More recap. We just saw this fer Pete’s sake. From black and white to colour, as Alex DR’s that he’s upset because he didn’t want to win HoH. Chelsia was happy for them until she realized that Amanda was going to be prancing around with the HoH key and her short shorts. Hee. Chelsia calls Amanda a Princess. Yep. Ryan is bummed because he and Jen aren’t guaranteed safe. Parker thinks he went from Brad and Angelina to Kathy Griffin and Pauly Shore. Hey, I like Kathy Griffin.

Oh god. Amanda doesn’t like her picture on the memory wall. She’d rather have a picture of her booty. ‘Cause that’s where her brain is I assume. Jen sees the pictures and points out that hers is first, ’cause she’s going to win. James DR’s that Jen is the cockiest person in the house so far. Parker knows that the other hamsters aren’t pleased with Jen’s comments too. James, who is dressed in what looks like a negligee, tells Parker to tell Jen to turn it down a little.

Parker brings Jen into the room with James and tells her to calm down. Jen apologizes. Parker is not happy, but they hug.

Joshuah and Allison both think Jen’s a bitch. Allison DR’s that being with someone else’s boyfriend isn’t an advantage at all. She tells Parker that she doesn’t want to be in the middle of all of this. They agree that it’s a tough situation. She tells Parker that Jen will not control her at all. Amanda (who is wearing hideous knee socks with booty shorts) runs to tell Jen that Parker and Allison are talking, so Jen gets Ryan and they go to see what’s up. Allison says that she’s not happy with the situation, and tells Jen straight up that if she disrespects her, she’s screwed. She threatens to tell everyone the secret because she doesn’t want to deal with it.

Jen DR’s that, if Allison reveals the secret, she’ll mess up everyone’s game and it will really, really, really piss her off. Allison tells Ryan that she can’t trust him to stay aligned with her over his girlfriend. Allison admits that she doesn’t like Jen, and that Jen acts like this is her show. Ryan promises her that she’s his girl and he won’t put Jen over her.

Amanda is telling everyone that people think she’s dumb when they meet her. Neil asks how she deals with that, and she says that her father hung himself, and that if she can deal with picking out his coffin at 21 years old, she can deal with anything. He apparently called and left her a message that said, “thanks, you never answer your phone when I need you - I’m going to kill myself.” And he did. Wow. Amanda says that’s why she’s always happy, because she wants other people to think she’s a good person.

Time to see the HoH room. Amanda is screaming like someone set her booty on fire. The room has a tropical look to it. There are pictures of Amanda and Alex together on the walls. Alex DR’s about losing his father, who died on 9-11. Amanda starts to cry when she finds her dad’s favourite CD in her basket. All the hamsters are wearing leis for some reason.

Jen and Parker confront Allison about how she has to be strong. She says she’s not doing anything. Parker says she’s being childish by threatening to reveal the secret. Allison infers that she’s giving up, she doesn’t want to do this. Jen DR’s that all she has to do is shut up and keep her mouth shut. Right, because she did such a great job of that herself. Thank god, it’s commercial time. There’s a lot of action in this episode so far!

We’re back. Night vision. James is saying that Adam’s name is the “Hooded Warrior” because he’s not circumcised. Jen wants to see it, and apparently she gets to. Adam DR’s that he gave her a glimpse. And then he licks his teeth and sits there looking like a baboon. Ugh.

Morning time, and Allison pulls Sheila into the storage room because she needs to tell someone what’s going on. She says that she and Ryan are a huge target, but she doesn’t tell Sheila why.

Jen and Parker don’t want Allison to have anything over them. They decide to tell people the secret themselves before Allison does. These people? Are not bright. Parker goes to tell Alex and Matt. Alex and Matt both DR that Parker shouldn’t have kept this a secret, and that he’s a hypocrite because he woke everyone up to get the truth out of Jacob.

Jen and Parker tell Amanda and Natalie together. Amanda says that she’s livid because she trusted Jen. Natalie just seems surprised. Matt goes to talk with Allison and tells her that everyone knows. Allison is really pissed, and tells Matt that she’s not playing the game for Ryan and Jen. Allison goes out and asks Jen if she told everyone, and Jen grins and says, “yep, ’cause you were gonna do it first.” Jen yells at her, calling her a liar and clapping her hands telling her to get over herself. Allison calls Jen disrespectful, and Jen says she doesn’t care. Wow, that Jen? Is a royal bitch. Her eyes are bugging out and everything, and she’s just elated over the fact that she thinks she outplayed Allison. Idiot.

Pool time now. Allison is telling Neil and Joshuah, tearfully, about the whole situation, and says that they were threatening her not to tell anyone. The boys are shocked. Shocked! Josh DR’s that other people must know each other too. Amanda calls a house meeting, to find out if anyone else is connected. They pass a bible around to swear on. Gah. Natalie DR’s that if people swear on the bible and lie, they’re going to hell. Allison apologizes for holding this secret.

Matt and Alex, who appear to be removing their nail polish together, decide that there’s a lot of “weak” in this house. Alex swears on his father that the two of them are going to the end. They then inform Amanda and Natalie that they have an alliance. And then the brain trust decides that they have to win HoH, alternately, every week. That’s their strategy. Seriously. Is there anyone in the house besides Allison that might have some game?

Nighttime again. Allison is telling Sheila how crappy this situation is. Sheila is giving her a pep talk, and commiserating about being in a tough situation in the house. They hang out in the bathroom together and decide that the real twist should be that they’re lesbians and have been together for years. They tell Joshuah first. He freaks out. Hee! He says he never would have pegged that in a million years. Oh, this is funny. Josh is so cute. He DR’s that he didn’t pick up on anything. Allison says that they told him first because they knew he would tell everyone. He goes straight to Neil and tells him. Neil reacts much the same way.

Ha! Joshuah says he thinks it’s true because “she” wears those running boots! Love these two. Allison and Sheila tell everyone that they have an adopted son. They’re telling everyone this story.

Now we’re outside in the morning, and Allison is running laps around the backyard. Adam is heckling her, while Sheila complains to Parker about him. Sheila says that there’s nothing he could say or do to make her like him. Alex DR’s that all Sheila does is abuse Adam. He tells Sheila that at least he doesn’t go around talking shit about her. They start shouting at each other, and Matt yells out for Adam to come check his woman. Adam confronts her and asks what he’s done to make her treat him like this. Sheila starts to cry, shouts at him, and walks away screaming.

Ryan seems happy because now he’s sure that Amanda and Alex will target Sheila and Adam instead of him or Jen. Sheila goes in and throws herself on one of the beds, sobbing.

Ah, now we get the “Nominations Today” screen in the living room. Alex explains that one of their duties as Hoh … blah blah blah. Allison DR’s that the stupidest thing anyone has done is Jen and Ryan giving up their secret, because now it’s messed up everyone’s game. Adam thinks that if he goes up, it’s Sheila’s fault because she keeps mouthing off. Amanda says that if she and Alex don’t reach an agreement, they go on the block and the couple who finished in second place becomes HoH. Cool.

Hamsters at the round table, HoH key box is brought out. Alex reminds them that they do everything as couples. No kidding. Let’s get on with it, people. First keys go to Sheila and Adam. They pull the keys out in pairs. James and Chelsia are safe. Matt and Natalie are safe. Joshuah and Neil are safe. That means Ryan and Allison, and Jen and Parker are nominated. Alex explains that it’s purely strategic because Jen and Ryan have an advantage, and need to be split up. Jen is crying.

Allison says she’s going to do everything she can to get rid of Jen this week, while Ryan says that he knew if there secret came out there would be a bull’s eye on their heads. Jen? Shrugs and says oh well, Ryan has to go. Nice. Real nice. Alex and Amanda are looking forward to Ryan and Jen campaigning against each other. Jen? Is crying. Even as the rest of them hug each other, she’s weeping. Get a grip honey.

I wonder why we didn’t see more of Neil this episode? I mean, he doesn’t have much more face time, so they really should have given him some camera time. I guess we’ll have to wait until Tuesday to see how that all went down.

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Tags: big brother, reality tv