Big Brother 9 Live Feeds, March 23rd, Part Two – What Did the Poor Chocolate Bunny Ever do to Chelsia?
Ryan finally gets up to keep Josh company. They complain about the game, the people in the house, how bored they are, etc. Then Sheila’s up and she talks to Ryan about wanting to take her son to Memphis to visit family. He looks like he’s completely tuned out.
Looks like other hamsters are waking up now. Let the bitchfests begin! James and Chelsia are complaining about Natalie’s cooking, and James says that they can eat later, he’ll cook for them. Nat is making steak and KD for her crew. Couldn’t BB have given them something catered for Easter dinner? Joshuah says that they have to stop planning ways to attack Natalie and Sheila in advance, because the DR hears them and steps in.
Dinner’s ready – sort of. There are people eating, but Natalie is still cooking steak and Sheila is making garlic mashed potatoes with mushroom sauce. And yes, James, Josh, and Chelsia are all eating the food that Natalie cooked and they bashed just a few minutes earlier.
Chelsia, Josh, and Natalie are now decorating eggs. Natalie spends a long time mixing up colours, and Josh is trying to make a camouflage egg for his dad because he likes to hunt. They’re planning to decorate the eggs tonight and hide them tomorrow now. Chelsia gets pissed off at Natalie taking over the project, and goes off to sulk with James. She’s proud of herself because she called Natalie out for eating so quickly.
Ryan and Adam try their hands at egg decorating, and Sheila comes in to gush over how beautiful they all are. Sharon and Josh go to the room of sulking with James and Chelsia, and bitch about Natalie taking over and telling everyone what to do. Eventually they go back out, and Chelsia is in Nat’s face about how many eggs she’s done and that the others might want to do some as well. Here we go. Egg-gate is officially on.
Josh and James find booze in the storage room and go about hiding some for themselves and Chelsia, trying to think of excuses to give if someone asks why there’s less than usual. A few minutes later, Ryan comes in and asks why there’s less beer than usual. Hee. James and Josh claim that they don’t know. Everyone has a drink and says Happy Easter and thank you to BB. Josh says that when he gets out, he’s going to suck BB’s dick. Well that’s nice.
Most of them are painting their coloured eggs with nail polish now and talking about past comps. Sheila’s drinking and talking, saying she’s going to bring out her alter ego, Kimberley. Adam says he likes Kimberley better than Sheila. Heh. James says that he hopes they’re all proud of themselves wasting three cartons of eggs. He’s such a festive fellow.
James and Adam go outside and complain to each other that winning HoH is hard, and that they had the worst weeks to win it in. Adam says it must be tough for James, with the pressure to win every competition or he’s out. James says he doesn’t want HoH and is fine with Ryan or Natalie winning it. He’s happy to just keep winning the vetoes. Ugh. James goes back inside, and Sharon comes out to soak her feet in the hot tub.
BB calls an indoor lockdown, because one of the cameras in the backyard fell off it’s perch. Sheila tells Adam that Kimberley is feeling frisky. Oh brother. James and Josh go tell Chelsia that they hid four beers for her and told the others that they only got four for everyone. They’re encouraging her to go drink. Ryan comes in and James asks him to play chess. Ryan says maybe later, and tells him that he only learned how to play when he came in the house. James thinks he’s lying, and Ryan wants to know what the point would be to lie about that. Indeed.
Ryan and Adam head outside since the lockdown is over, and rack up the pool balls. They’re making fun of James out there, and laughing about how they all say every week that they need to win HoH. At least someone realizes how ridiculous it is. Adam says that they have a one in seven chance of winning the game, but if they get James out their chances will double.
James, Chelsia, and Joshuah are sharing stories about being drunk, driving drunk, rolling cars, and auditioning for reality shows. Seriously. Josh is saying that you can’t just be yourself at reality auditions, you have to turn up the sexuality. He says he was drunk and did an audition, and stripped down to his underwear and boots and told them that this is what Texas is made of. And here I thought things were big in Texas. He’s not clear if this was for his BB audition or not, but I sure hope not. It’s disturbing to think that would be his key to success with the casting department.
Sheila and Natalie are chatting in the kitchen, and Sheila says that BB should never give them booze because Adam is starting to look good to her. Ha! That’s the first time in a while that I’ve actually laughed out loud while watching the feeds. Ryan comes by and Sheila says she really wanted him or Alex to be her partner in the game. Ryan, playing along, says it’s a good thing they weren’t partners, or bad things would have happened.
Joshuah comes out and says that Kimberley is getting frisky in there, then calls her “aged meat.” Adam says he wouldn’t mind going a couple rounds with Kim, but then laughs it off when Josh tries to work on a plan to make it happen. Adam says no, he was kidding, but then he and Ryan start talking about how Sheila’s probably pretty good in the sack. Speaking of which, James and Chelsia are going at it in their bed.
Natalie is inside staring at Matt’s picture on the memory wall, and the guys outside make fun of her. Ryan asks Josh if he should shave his arm hair, and Josh says it would make his muscles pop. Bleh. Don’t do it Ryan. All the waxing and shaving is out of control. Sheila wants to know what happened to their big chocolate bunny, and someone tells her that Chelsia smashed it. Nice.
Natalie’s talking about masturbating and how she hasn’t had the urge since they’ve been in the house. Chelsia calls out asking her if she can get herself off while giving a blow job. Natalie says no, and she doesn’t know who started those rumours. Chelsia says it was Matt, and Josh says that the feed watchers record stuff like that and put it all up on YouTube. Nat says Matty can start all the rumours he wants, but that never happened.
Josh uses his fake shocked voice and asks Chelsia if she got a second wind. She says no, she just realized after smashing the bunny that she’s about to be evicted from the BB house. She tells Natalie not to look so sad, and Nat says she’s not sad, she loves her life. Chelsia says that James is the only one in there who will be invited back for All Stars, because everyone else in there sucks at life. Give me a break. She’s laughing and saying that it’s going to be fun when they all meet the real Chelsia after the show because she’s actually a sweetheart.
James comes out and tries to get Chelsia to come back to bed with him. She says no, he just wants her to shut her mouth and she’s not going to. Rats. She looks around and then attacks the bowl of eggs that they all just spent hours decorating, smashing them all and squishing them between her fingers. She’s got the crazy-person laugh going again and saying that now they won’t all be able to sell them on eBay for $300 apiece. Somewhere Zach is crying over the loss of potential revenue.
Chelsia moves on to the marshmallow peeps and the chocolate, smashing everything she can reach. She’s yelling, “What are you fuckers going to do, evict me?” Natalie has left and is now in the sauna room painting her toenails and whispering bible quotes to herself. Chelsia keeps ranting and smashing, saying she’s going to sequester now to fuck Matty until his eyes straighten out. James is trying to calm her down, and asks her if she’s really going to screw Matt. She says yes, she plans to. She’s hollering to Natalie making fun of her artwork and painting, and calling her a white trash whore.
Chelsia shouts out, “Happy Birthday Jesus!” and James, the atheist, tells her it’s not his birthday. Heh. Sheila tells Chelsia that she doesn’t care about all the stuff she’s saying, she just doesn’t like that she makes fun of Matt’s eyes because he has no control over that. Chelsia offers to go down on Sheila for her vote. Now she’s yelling that she and James just had sex. “We just had sex! I didn’t get off this time, but I did last night when we had sex!” And, cue the flames.
Adam and Ryan are safely in the HoH room watching all of this unfold on the spy screen. These two? Not as dumb as they appear.
Josh, Sharon, and James are hiding out together, agreeing that there’s no way to save Chelsia now and it’s definitely best for them if she goes. No kidding. This chick makes Maggie, April, and J-Blow look like nuns. But what did they think would happen after squirreling away the beer for her?
Sheila is crying, saying that this is really uncomfortable and she hates that Matt isn’t there to defend himself. Joshuah goes to her and asks her if she’s Matt’s mom. What? She denies it, but Josh is convinced because this is the same way his own mom cried when he came out to her. These are mother’s tears, and he can tell. Sheila’s still crying and trying to deny it, but she’s not very convincing. Josh says it’s okay, he won’t tell anyone else, and leaves.
Natalie is called to the DR, and Chelsia shouts out that she can’t say anything about the abortions because the aborted babies will sue her. She apologizes to Sheila for killing the chocolate bunny and the comments about Matt’s eye, and then goes to her bedroom. James asks her what she’s doing, and she says she’s getting her sweatpants and then going to look for something to break. James warns her not to destroy anything, and she says she’s not stupid. James wants to know why she’s letting everything get to her like this if she doesn’t care about these people.
When Nat comes out, she goes up to the HoH room to talk to Adam. She wonders why Chelsia is only targeting her. She brings up her Matty, and Adam tries to explain to her that Matt is a player and he went for her, Chelsia, and Sharon trying to get them to protect him. Natalie says she only has a crush, that it’s been a long time since she met someone she liked, and she’s not in love with the guy.
Natalie says that she doesn’t believe Chelsia’s story about being fingered by Matt, but Adam says it’s true, and it happened at the counter in the storage room. Natalie is visibly upset about this, but instead says that’s gross and she hopes he washed his hands afterwards. Hee.
Natalie goes downstairs to talk to Josh and Sheila. Nat says that the DR told her that Chelsia will be removed from the house early if she keeps this up, and that they’re proud of Natalie because she’s handling it all very well. She really is. She says that she’s not sure what to believe about Matt and Chelsia. She tends to doubt it happened, because Matt would always pull the covers over their heads when they kissed in bed.
A little while later, Josh tells Ryan that he’s figured it all out. Sheila is actually Ryan’s mom. Ryan can’t believe it. Of course Josh is saying that Sheila confirmed it, which she didn’t.
Natalie comes out reading her bible. She’s with Adam, Joshuah, Sheila, and Ryan in the kitchen. They’re all just talking and getting along well – that is until Chelsia gets out of bed. She waits in the hallway, listening to them all for a few minutes, and then comes into the kitchen and asks Natalie if she’s praying for her. Natalie says no, and keeps reading.
Chelsia says that the way she’s been acting isn’t really her. Sheila responds that she likes Chelsia, but she just doesn’t know. She doesn’t think she really wants to be there if she can act that way. Chelsia says she does want to be there, and it’s not about the money. She’d be there for free, she just wants to push herself. She uses the fact that she tried to give away her trip to Adam as proof that she’s not in it for money.
Meanwhile, Sharon’s gone to James and told him that there’s a relationship between Sheila and Matt, and they’ve been trying to figure it out. Joshuah is going to be really upset that he didn’t get to deliver this scoop to James himself. Sharon thinks they’re aunt and nephew or maybe mother and son. This little meeting of the minds concludes that Sheila said something about her son having problems with his eyes, Matt wants to move to LA not to pursue acting but to be closer to “Mom,” and that Sheila is living in an apartment and that’s why Matt wanted to win something for his mom, so he could buy her a house. Gah. Then they think that the four colours in the guinea pig cage means that there are four relationships in the house. Sharon/Jacob, Jen/Ryan, Sheila/Matt … and? James can hear Chelsia talking in the kitchen, and tells Sharon that she needs to cut it out. He gets up to leave the room.
Chelsia is telling Sheila and whoever else is around that she’s had a problem with Natalie since day one. She doesn’t like that Nat uses her religion to explain away all of the mistakes she’s made in life, and thinks that she needs to get an education so that she doesn’t have to rely on her looks to get by in life. Chelsia is talking pretty loudly now, saying that she knows she’s acting childish and disgusting, but she thinks they were all put there to learn a lesson in life. Ah, that’s her mistake right there. Reading way too much into a fleeting appearance on a reality show.
Sheila says that she’s heard Chelsia called her (Sheila) crazy and that she didn’t understand how she passed the psych test. Chelsia admits that she did say that, and then says that they all say stuff because they’re all there to win the money. Good lord woman, three minutes ago you were willing do this for free.
Now James and Josh are discussing the non-existent Sheila/Matt relationship. Josh says that Sheila called him “family.” Well yes, but she meant that you’re all family to her. There. In the house. James goes back to the bedroom and tells Sharon that he’s an even bigger target now because he took out Sheila’s son. Hee.
Sheila wants to know if Chelsia’s claims about Matt fingering her actually happened. She says that he did lift her up and put her on the counter in the storage room, and he threw her down on the bed a couple of times in the HoH room. Well yeah, I saw that happen. But they were laughing about it. Sheila wants to know if he actually fingered her, and she says no, but he did try. Good. Grief.
Sheila says she’s going to bed, but she gets sidetracked by Josh. He asks her about Matt, and she’s playing kind of coy about it. She denies that she’s related to Matt, but then says something’s going on and she can’t talk about it without permission. I immediately assumed she meant Ryan losing his grandfather, but then she goes on about the things she and Matt have in common. So I’m not really sure if she’s just trying to confuse Josh now or what’s going on.
Sheila complains about Natalie, saying that she’s been running Adam’s HoH this week and she needs to go. Joshuah points out that he’s never even been on the block and giggles about how incredible that is. Now they’re laughing that they’re going to have to shove Chelsia out the door this week because she won’t leave on her own. Josh tells her about Chelsia offering Adam the Vegas trip to put Natalie on the block, but he wouldn’t do it. This is really weird that they’re getting along so well, by the way.
Everyone goes to bed, at least until James and Chelsia jump out and scare Josh as he’s going into the bedroom. He screams like a little girl as they go to the bathroom together. Josh decides to hide under their bed to wait for them to come back. He gives up a little while later, and goes to the bathroom himself. James is in there with Chelsia, and her legs are up on his shoulders. They all talk about having sex in the house, and James says the first time was before he was evicted. Chelsia disagrees. Who cares?
Josh leaves, and James starts talking about how huge and hairy Chelsia’s girly bits are. I know, you didn’t want to hear about that, and I apologize. The cameras give us four feeds of night vision bedrooms, but the audio is making it very clear that there are other things going on with James and Chelsia. And that’s about it for the day. Thank goodness.
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Tags: big brother, big brother live feeds, big brother 9 spoilers, reality tv
Big Brother 9 Live Feeds, March 23rd, Part One – Happy Easter, Hamsters
LauraBelle is taking a much-needed vacation this week, so you’re stuck with me and only me on live feed action. So please be forgiving if I get a little behind, although I’ll try my best to keep up! While I worry over the state of my mental health, let’s see how the houseguests spent their Easter Sunday.
BB wakes the hamsters up this morning at about 9:15, and we’re treated to half an hour of trivia. When we come back, Joshuah is bitching that they don’t have anything special for Easter. He goes out and tells Adam that he heard he had an interesting offer last night, and then Josh is called to the DR.
Adam goes inside and talks to Sheila. She asks him if he’s ready for the veto ceremony, and then how he’s doing with his cigarettes. He’s concerned because he only has 15 packs left. He’s been trying to cut down, but this week has been stressful for him. Speaking of stressful, Sharon’s in the kitchen yelling to her BEEBEES!
Joshuah’s out of the DR, and he’s talking about how much the people on the internet love his morning dance routines. Chalk up another one who thinks we get to hear the morning wakeup calls. Josh my dear, we sometimes hear the intro to the first song, and then we get to watch a close up of the fireplace with the BB theme music. We don’t see your dancing. And some of us don’t consider that a bad thing.
Baller and Josh go back outside and Adam says that he turned down Chelsia’s offer. He’s not 100% sure she’d follow through with it, and he says it might be a different story if she could outright give him the trip. But if he keeps both James and Chelsia in the house this week, he’s risking his own safety. Josh says he understands, and says she had two chances – the HoH and PoV comps – and didn’t save herself, so she’s out.
James is slow to get up this morning and BB has to call out to him twice before he wrestles himself out of bed. He goes outside where Josh is asking Chelsia how many eggs they boiled last night to decorate. She says three cartons, and Josh is upset because that’s all the eggs they had. James is pissed off as well. He goes inside and tells Natalie and Sheila that they have no more effing eggs and he knows he’s crabby in the morning but he just wants an effing egg and they boiled all of the effing eggs. 36 effing eggs. Chelsia is called to the DR, and James says, “That’s because she boiled all of the effing eggs.” I’m noticing a pattern here.
Ryan is feeling sad about his grandfather dying, and talks to Sheila about it. Say what you want about Sheila, but I’m glad she’s there for Ryan right now. He talks about how he’s missing his family and really wants to be with them, but knows that they want him to stay. Sheila tells him that she’s always there if he needs to talk to her. She tells him about her own grandmother again, and how she feels that missing her funeral was good for her because she didn’t want to have the memory of her lying dead in her casket. Now she has only good and loving memories.
Ryan goes to talk with Joshuah, and they confirm their super-secret alliance. Josh says that he wants to put up Adam and Sheila if he wins HoH, and Ryan says that he doesn’t really feel that he’s part of one side or the other, so he’s not sure what he’d do. I guess Joshuah is buying this, because Ryan is stressing that he wouldn’t put him on the block. Josh dishes that Chelsia will be out the door with a 5-0 vote, because James won’t even give her a pity vote.
James is called to the DR and BB calls an outside lockdown. Veto ceremony time is approaching. Adam is laughing because he had tried to joke with Sheila that she’ll be going on the block, and she apparently didn’t find much humour in it.
We go to trivia now for a bit, and when we return Sharon is on the block as expected. Chelsia is moping a bit, and James says that now Adam knows James is gunning for him. Guess it was a fun little ceremony. Chelsia is ranting about Adam sucking at speeches (uh, James wasn’t very good either), and how he’s humiliated himself on TV. Wow, has she heard half the things that come out of her own mouth? She says she’s done with this bullshit. As if she has a choice.
Natalie is talking to Sheila about her fears that Chelsia will hook up with Matt in sequester just to spite her. Sheila says that once she gets to sequester, there’s no game any more. She won’t need votes or anything, so there’s no reason to do anything. She says that Matt would never get with Chelsia anyway, and they’ll have separate rooms.
Josh and James are playing pool. James says he does feel bad for Chelsia, but it was him or her this week. Josh says she did terrible in the veto comp, and that was her chance to save herself. James thinks she’s regretting voting him back into the game, and Josh thinks a lot of them are. He also thinks that the other side is really pissed off because they wanted Josh to go up instead of Sharon. Josh really has no pulse on how people feel in that house, does he? He’s so wrong, so often.
Chelsia goes to Ryan in the kitchen and says that she’s not going to mope or cry, she’s still planning to go out with a bang. Great. She says she wishes she had James’ vote at least, but understands that he has to play his own game. She asks him about his vote, and he says something about sticking with the majority even though he knows Sharon is a threat.
Chelsia then goes outside, and James tells her that it’s not over yet. She says it is, she just talked to Ryan and the house wants her gone. She mentions going out with a bang again, and Josh says that she can “go to town.” She says no, she’s just going to make little comments and suggestions for the next few days to try and get under their skin. Yeah, we’ll see how that pans out.
Quick flash over to the pool, where Natalie is telling Sheila that she asks god every day why he took Matt, why he took her future husband away from her. Oh dear. Natalie, I’m trying really hard to root for you because the other side makes me physically ill, but you’re not making this easy for me.
Everyone gathers to eat some pizza that Ryan made. There’s a lot of chatter, but it’s the same old stuff. Chelsia has marshmallow peeps that she says she got in her HoH basket. I thought they weren’t allowed to keep that stuff?
Ryan and Baller go outside, and Ryan says that he’s hearing rumours that the girls are trying to make a secondary alliance. I guess that would be Sharon, Natalie, and Sheila. Chelsia and Josh come out and now it’s a Natalie Bash Party.
Adam goes inside where Sheila is in the kitchen. They whisper to each other that, not only do they need HoH this week, but they have to stick together, all four of them. They can’t be considering going over to the other side, and can’t doubt each other. Adam is especially nervous because he can’t play for HoH, and has to depend on Natalie, Sheila, and Ryan. Sheila tells him that he’s done a really good job this week, breaking up one of the strong couples.
Big Bunny has left the hamsters an Easter basket in the storage room. There’s a candy making kit, chocolate bunnies, candy, dye for their eggs and a paint set, marshmallow peeps, and a bunch of other stuff in there. There’s much glee in this discovery. Looks like everyone got something just for them. There’s even a nicotine patch for Ryan. Happy Easter, buddy. The girls want to colour the eggs and hide them and have a big Easter egg hunt. Personally I think BB could have hidden stuff around the house and made it more fun for them, but whatever. They’re happy, so it’s all good.
The girls set about opening all of the stuff they have to decorate the eggs with. BB has taken the letter stickers and crayons out of the kits. Good grief. What are they going to do with a white crayon, for crying out loud? Chelsia is bitching that Natalie scooped the painting set for herself and hid it, along with a handful of candy. She asks if that’s a result of growing up poor.
Nat and Sheila head outside, leaving Chelsia and Sharon to decorate the eggs. Chelsia says that she cares about James, but doesn’t want to cuddle with him and stuff because the game is almost over. She says she might have a boyfriend back at home, so she’s not sure how this is all going to play out. Really? Too bad Natalie doesn’t know about this – at least she’d have some ammo to use against her. Sharon talks about what she would do with the money if she won. They discuss the fact that Adam, Ryan, Natalie, and Sheila all have a deal to go to the end together. Ya think?
Josh comes in and eats a ton of candy, saying that he’s depressed so he doesn’t care that he’s going to gain all the weight back that he’s lost. Sharon tells him that he can talk to her if he needs to. They’re lying on their bed, and she’s stroking his hair while he cries about leaving Chase behind and how he was supposed to be on the show as well but he couldn’t leave his job.
Josh goes to the hot tub as the rest of the hamsters are napping or showering. He says to himself that his boyfriend is probably out drinking, his family is gathered together for Easter, and here he sits alone with a house full of crazy people. He says he’s mentally cracking, but he’s okay, he can do this. Then he’s talking to Jesus, I guess, saying, “You were resurrected and now so am I.” Uh, okay. He keeps talking and praying, and then starts to cry. I want to feel bad for the guy, but a few minutes later he’s ranting about wanting to sew Natalie’s nether regions together, so the moment is gone.
Everyone else is sleeping now, so I have to watch Josh play pool by himself. Then he’s dancing and talking and just being Josh. Sounds like a good time to take a break and move on to part two for the day.
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Tags: big brother, big brother live feeds, big brother 9 spoilers, reality tv
Big Brother 9 Live Feeds, March 22nd, Part II, James Wants It Bad
I think James wants to win this game more then he lets on with his offers to throw it all away for sexual favors, etc. When he came back in the game, he came back with a vengeance, although he got ahead of himself that week in HoH and turned into a total dick. Yet, now with his back again against the wall, he’s making more smart game moves.
After half the house got to see the movie 21, Sharon gives a quick review, saying there’s no hot sex, yet it’s so bad ass and was fun times. I’m guessing we won’t see her as the next person filling in for Ebert anytime soon. I’m available, though, just in case Roeper was wondering.
James goes to Josh asking him who has promised not to put him up,realizing that since he’s never been on the block, it can’t be because he’s just such a standup guy or something. Josh doesn’t tell his alliance partner that he goes around begging the current HoH to not nominate him every week, making deals all over the place, but does say Ryan told him he wasn’t after him, as well as Adam, but he doesn’t count much, since he can’t win HoH next week. James tells him he thinks Sharon is going up in his place, but he’s not sure.
Chelsia comes out and joins them and talks about the trip she won to Las Vegas, saying she’s thinking of taking her brother’s ex, because she missed her birthday. I’m sure many of the people here were wishing she would have mentioned their name, and I have to wonder why she would offer Adam blow jobs every day to save her, yet not think of offering to take him to Las Vegas. True, I wouldn’t want to take Baller on a trip with me either, but I also wouldn’t want my mouth anywhere near the Hooded Warrior.
James tells the rest of his alliance about his chat with Natalie, saying it’ll be a different game without Matt and probably Chelsia as well. Sharon thinks Sheila will be mad about the agreement, but James says no, as she’s playing both sides as well. Who isn’t? Chelsia adds she doesn’t want any hugs when she laves, and I’m thinking there isn’t a lot of danger in that. James somehow was reading my mind earlier and tells Chelsia to barter her trip with Adam if he’ll put up Natalie. Sharon thinks Adam will take the deal, and then they can send him to sequester the following week.
As Natalie is telling Sheila about her talk with James, Chelsia goes and asks the DR if she can barter with her trip, and when Adam comes outside, she asks if he’s sad she didn’t give him her ticket. He mentions something about being called a loser. Chelsia asks what he wants to stay in the game. While Josh is saying they should go for Natalie, as Sheila isn’t worth the trip, Adam paces around like he’s thinking about it. We lose the feeds for a few minutes, and when we come back, Josh is telling Adam he can’t blame Chelsia for trying, while Adam is saying he did what he thought was best for him, so apparently he wouldn’t take any offers. Maybe she should have stuck with the BJ offer.
He may be putting the cart before the horse, but Josh thanks Adam for putting up Sharon, keeping him safe, and she says she’s fine with it. She also thinks this is going to be his best HoH deal. Ryan tells her he thinks she’ll have the least stressful time on the block, meaning Chelsia leaving is a forgone conclusion. Again, in this house, I wouldn’t count anyone gone just yet.
Natalie tells Sheila about the guys goading Mattie into letting her give him a BJ, and him not wanting to as he’d have to make out with her first, so they joked about making out for two to five minutes, then doing it. Sheila thinks it’s funny, assumably not realizing what Natalie is really telling her isn’t a joke, but reality.
Adam shares with Ryan about Chelsia’s offer to him, and he’s shocked she did it in front of Josh and Sharon, as you can have sex in front of other people, but you can’t make offers, I guess. Adam then says oddly he was wondering who he’d piss off if he put up Sheila or Natalie, or even Ryan. Ryan seems a little shocked, and Adam confirms he wouldn’t, saying he’ll probably just put Sharon up.
Josh is inside complaining about the popcorn they left all over the floor, and Chelsia tells him she made a request for the vacuum. Josh adds if they want the shitthole cleaned up, they have to give him the proper tools. Maybe I’ll try that with the family the next time I clean the house.
James and Chelsia kiss in the bathroom, and she confirms for him they wouldn’t let her use her prize as a bribe. She adds she will later watch every single episode of their season. If she only knew how bad it was, I don’t know if she’d make the same promise. James says she won’t, and right now the odds are against him winning, so I’m not seeing him tooling around on his bike, watching the show at night while camping out or whatever. Yet, he offers to fly to Iowa to watch it with her, and she says that would be okay. I think these two will split up quicker than Daniele and Nick. Once they finally have sex, it’ll kill this when will hit happen thing they have going and it will be over.
Natalie, Sheila, Adam, and Ryan are in the spa, with the women trying to convince Adam not to swear so much. They’d like him to stop saying sack, and thinking maybe he should say sack of nuts instead. I’m not getting why the longer version is better, but whatever.
James joins Sharon and Josh outside, and asks who they would rather have stay, Adam or Natalie. She says Adam, because Natalie is stronger in competitions, and Adam is an overweight smoker. I think James is working up to something really big next week and he’s setting it all up. Josh wants Sharon to tell Natalie to get her cheap shit clothes out of the dryer, and everyone trashes Natalie for the way she dresses. Sharon knows she’s pissed that Chelsia has been picking on Matt’s lazy eye. Josh asks her how she feels about abortions, and she says if there’s something wrong with the baby or if someone is raped, she understands, but … and Josh is called to the DR. Apparently they’re saving us from hearing Sharon’s abortion rhetoric.
While the anti-Bros are inside eating, Adam tells Ryan outside that Josh is all words. Ryan wants to know if Chelsia is making offers to stay, and when Natalie walks out, Adam tells her James has to go home. She says she knows that and adds she is d-u-n if she doesn’t win. I am fighting my fingers not to type the obvious joke here. And,you’re probably also d-u- … no! Slapping my fingers. I”m not doing it. She gets called to the DR, and Adam is pissed, as she’s in the middle of cooking their dinner inside.
Adam says he doesn’t want Natalie to leave the house, as he thinks they can use her. He also tells Ryan he hates “Jimmy,” and wonders why he’s such a shit. Isn’t everyone this year? I think it’s on the app Name …. Sex (M or F) … Sex (will you have it in the house Y or N) … Are you a shit (Y or N) … Ryan says he knew James wasn’t any good as he gets good vibes on people.
As Ryan and Adam come in to eat, it seems Chelsia wants to pierce James’ ears, and he’s willing, but Josh gets upset about this, telling them they can’t. They leave, so they’re apparently doing it, and Sharon and Josh go out to play pool while Adam watches. Taking advantage of his audience, Josh mentions that it didn’t help Chelsia stay in the house at all by winning the trip. Adam points out they make about $4.25 an hour plus food while staying in the house. Not even minimum wage?
Everyone keeps wondering what special things BB has planned for them on Easter Sunday. Chelsia even mentions boiling eggs tonight in the hopes they can dye them tomorrow. A note to them to make sure they don’t fall asleep while boiling them, as an hour in the pan boiling is a bit much. Just a note after my experience last night. Josh talks of a gay Easter egg hunt they have in Dallas. He’s seen many of his exes there. Adam wonders if there are fights, and Josh says there aren’t, but there are “bitch outs.”
Adam asks Josh why Chelsia isn’t campaigning against Sharon, and he says it’s just not going to happen. His only worry is that Natalie will wins HoH next week, as he knows she’ll put him up. Adam’s only worry is James winning again. He talks again of doing what’s best for the house, and notes that Chelsia seems to have accepted that she’s leaving. He notes he just has to make it through next week, then he can just win HoH again. Easier said than done, there, Adam. Sharon joins with worries of James making final four. If it comes down to her, Adam, James, and Natalie as final four, the odds for her and Adam winning are slim. In other words, she’s trying to put herself on the same playing field as him right now.
Josh ends up laying on his bed next to James and Chelsia on theirs. They talk about the goodbye messages they’ll leave her, and James asks Chelsia for a blow job, then asks for the reverse of that, and Josh corrects him that he should just ask to give her “oral pleasure.” Denied, James asks her to hand him the lotion and takes care of it himself. Natalie walks in, mentioning the DR told her that Sharon and Josh shouldn’t go to bed just yet, as they’ll be called in next. As much as Josh has said he wants to watch, he has his pillow over his head. Natalie walks in again and tosses a pair or socks into the action.
Once they switch to talking instead of sex, Josh falls asleep. Chelsia talks about her ex, Tom, saying they broke up because he went into the military. She’s over it now, figuring he’s probably had sex with half of Cedar Falls by now. Even the camera people are tired of watching James and Chelsia, as they show Josh snoring, then go to a closeup of a piranha, then back to Josh, still snoring. I love it when they do that stuff.
Ryan, Adam, and Natalie are playing pool in the backyard, with Natalie still insistent they need to get James out, and this after they already called their one week truce. Ryan accidentally hits the pool ball over the roof of the house, and Adam makes a joke that it had to be his ball that went over. She’s still on her kick about the number 8, and the guys laugh at her. They get into an argument over who Evel Dick likes best, as she thinks he likes the girls, but they think he likes James.
The bedroom action has broken up, and Josh has woken up. Chelsia doesn’t think he’s feeling well, as he jumped out of bed and ran out. Sheila asks if he’s eaten anything and he starts eating cake and ice cream. He asks her if she questions being in the house, and she admits to feeling that way. He knows he’s feeling anxiety, and he left the bedroom to eat, because it calms him. Doesn’t it calm us all? Sometimes a little too much, and then we get that nice little muffin top hanging over our jeans.
The pool game crew comes inside, and Chelsia starts asking everyone about boiling eggs for Easter. Sheila notes that they’ve now spent three holidays in the house. Chelsia talks to the anti-Bros in the bedroom, telling them that the DR has now told her she can offer to take Adam with her to Las Vegas. See, that’s what I’m saying. She wants to tell them they won’t let her give him the prize, but he can come with her, and even bring a friend if she wants. The talk goes to Easter again, with everyone hoping they get Easter baskets in the morning.
Adam thinks there’s not as much nudity this season as in others, but I beg to differ, and apparently Evel Dick did as well, telling them this season has had the most. Natalie brings up being on YouTube, but the poor thing doesn’t get it, wondering which camera is the YouTube camera. Then again, Chelsia doesn’t know the answer either. I think Carrie’s right that we need some type of HG 101 class for these people.
Sheila’s on a little bit of a tear talking about Adam getting lots of girls after the show because of his masturbating (Umm, yeah, that one goes me every time. What?), wondering if you can see through the HoH shower, wanting to grow her bush out,
wondering if Chelsia would do Adam to stay, and mentioning that the HGs last season borke a lot of rules, and now they’re paying for it this season. This brings up Jen from last season and Ryan calls her a “stupid bitch.” Chelsia knows her, and they mention her t-shirts as well as Zach’s.
As Sharon goes to bed, she tells Josh she’s taking a hit for him, so he better be nice. Adam goes to talk to Josh and Sharon,
saying he’s running out of people to go after, and he suggests Sheila again. Josh mentions he has no gay peeps in the house to get with. And what about Neil? He’s kind of like Chuck on Happy Days. He went up to his room one day and never came back and was never mentioned again.
Chelsia talks about her parents, saying she knows this week her dad is in Daytona for bike week. She hates the town she lives in, as there are a lot of meth users. Her mom is 51 and her dad 49. Her mom has a tattoo of Let it “Bee” and works in a high school. Sheila says it’s crazy with kids these days having cell phones, Blackberrys, etc. Boy, do I understand that.
Natalie, Adam, and Ryan talking about Matt, saying he was dumb to not do more with Natalie. OMG, do they have to lead her on like that? Why can’t they just tell her she was making more out of the relationship than what was there? She thinks James and Chelsia are covering a lot of bases together, as she saw condoms and KY next to their bed. Adam wants to set Natalie up with a friend of his, telling her she rates a 8-1/2. Gee, what an honor to have Baller rate you.
While everyone else is having random discussions about porn, soap operas, and the number 8 (guess who?), Chelsia approaches Adam about taking him with her to Las Vegas if he keeps her safe. He wonders why he would do this, as he doesn’t have a vote. She thinks it would work if he put up Sheila or Natalie, but he protests, saying they’re his security blankets. All of a sudden Adam is seeming like a much bigger player in this game than we imagined, as Chelsia asks how he’s going to get Natalie out, and he says he’s going to have Chelsia’a guys do it for him. Adam notes he doesn’t ever want to be HoH again.
Natalie and Sheila bond, as Natalie tells the truth, that she’s not a cheerleader. Natalie thinks they should make up another story just to to mess with the others, and I sure hope Sheila doesn’t fall for that again! They agree that they only have each other in the house, saying they don’t really trust Ryan or Adam. Natalie claims that she isn’t really dumb, that’s it’s all just an act. After this week, I’d be inclined to believe her on that.
Adam and Ryan have a late night pool game, and Adam mentions to him the deal that Chelsia made to him. He decides he’s not going to take the deal, saying that he doesn’t trust that she’d actually keep the deal, especially if he ends up voting her out later in the game.
James and Chelsia are making out yet again in the sauna room. He asks if she wants him to get a blanket to cover them up so that they can go all the way. She’s afriad it will come back to haunt them with the feeds, but he tells her it won’t matter there, as there are no cameras in the sauna room. Here’s another place where that HG101 would help. They move to the bathroom and are really getting into it, and get interrupted by Josh walking through to use the facilities, saying “don’t mind the homosexual.” James then leaves and comes back, claiming to have asked the DR if they could have sex in there. According to him they said they could as long as they could still see both their heads. As Josh sits down to join them, though, on their couch, the mood seems to be lost.
This is pretty much it for the HGS that night. Stay tuned here to see if they get Easter treats or not.
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